Unfortunately, sometimes it is days between transmissions and I am left to wonder who won the base-ball games on the planet called Earth. During these gaps, I review video footage I have already received from this alien planet, hoping to discover something I may have missed in prior viewings. Since I am going to review the base-ball team known as the "New York Yankees," I thought I would look at some of the videos about this city called New York, but there are hours and hours of information about this city and I have chosen only the most recent videos. I feel that the city of New York must be the most important city on the planet. However, much of the footage I have acquired is disturbing.
I am particularly curious about the mating habits of Earthlings after watching many hours of a program called "Sex in the City." It focuses on the lives of a particular kind of Earthing called "woman," and there seems to be much difficulty in finding a suitable mate for reproductive purposes. It appears that there are two variations of Earthling necessary for mating, those being "woman" and "man." The particular womans on the program "Sex in the City" can be described as whiny and never content with the things they have, which are many. The dominant woman in this program has an obsession with the painful type of shoe I described in a previous entry. These womans do not seem pleasant and I do hope that not all of the womans on Earth are this disagreeable.
Another program about the city of New York that I have frequently viewed is called "Seinfeld." I do not know what to make of this program. It seems as if the Earthlings in this program are purposely making life difficult for themselves and for other people. One in particular, a short, bald man, is always yelling about things that do not matter. Another, a tall man with strange hair, seems to have some sort of mental deficiency. The one called "Jerry Seinfeld" is something called a "comedian," which consists of standing in front of groups of Earthlings and telling stories. These stories are called "jokes" and seem to please the Earthlings. I do not know if this is a peculiar pastime of New York or if this is common among Earthlings.
Taken together, these two programs make the city of New York seem like an undesirable place. Yet I feel there is a kind of magic about this grand city and that maybe I do not understand these programs. New York has buildings that reach to the heavens, something you cannot find on the planet Tralfamadore, as our atmosphere must be much smaller than that of Earth. No Tralfamadorian could survive in a building as tall as the ones in New York. I think if the Earthlings can build such magnificent towers, they must be better than those featured on the Sex and the City and Seinfeld programs.
In New York there are two Major League Base-ball teams. One is called the Yankees and they are in the American League. The other is called the Mets and they are in the National League. I will get to the Mets later. The Yankees are historically the best team in the Major League Base-ball. They have won twenty-seven of the championships they call the "World Series" that is only played in the region they call "America." They have won the championship as recently as four seasons ago and they could do it again this year, though, as I mentioned, this division called the "American League East" is full of very good teams.
The uniform of the Yankees team is iconic on planet Earth. It consists of a black cap with a white NY stitched upon it and pinstriped shirts and pants. I am considering commissioning our local tailor to fashion such a uniform for me; however, as we don't wear clothing on Tralfamadore, I would probably not wear it, not wanting to draw attention to myself.
There appears to be some disparity in the wealth of teams. "Wealth" is the amount of resources available to the Earthlings to acquire items they do not make themselves. These can be items of necessity, such as the food they must consume to sustain their bodies, or extraneous items that give them pleasure but are not necessary for survival. One of the ugly things about Earthlings that I have discovered after studying many hours of videos is that their lives revolve around the acquisition of such items and that many Earthlings take so much of the available resources that others do not have enough to feed themselves. This is a cause of many conflicts in which they try to destroy each other. I am unable to understand how a civilization that can build such magnificent structures into the sky and invent the great game of base-ball is of insufficient intelligence to avoid such conflicts.
These kinds of inequalities exist everywhere on Earth, including in the great game of base-ball. This is why the New York Yankees have won more championships than all of the other teams - they have more wealth than the other teams and they buy better quality players. Yes, Earthlings buy other Earthlings. The wealthiest of them buy the labor of the less wealthy and they become a part of the wealthiest's wealth. This is a very complicated issue that warrants in-depth study. However, that is not the focus of this entry; I only mention it because the New York Yankees base-ball team has so much wealth and buys players. As a result, their team looks very different from the previous season. They bought these players: Jacoby Ellsbury, Carlos Beltran, Brian McCann, Kelly Johnson, Brian Roberts, Alfonso Soriano. Alfonso Soriano was added at the end of last year. This is probably their batting lineup:
- CF Jacoby Ellsbury
- SS Derek Jeter
- RF Carlos Beltran
- C Brian McCann
- 1B Mark Teixeira
- DH Alfonso Soriano
- 3B Kelly Johnson
- 2B Brian Roberts
- LF Brett Gardner
On the bench are these players: C Francisco Cervelli, OF Ichiro Suzuki, IF Brendan Ryan, IF Scott Sizemore. Ichiro Suzuki used to be one of the best hitters but his body has aged and he no longer has the capability he once had. This is what happens to Earthlings. For the first twenty of their Earth years or so, their bodies are in development. The next ten of their years are the best years and then their bodies begin to age. They only exist for approximately eighty Earth years before ceasing to live. One wonders how they accomplish anything in that short amount of time. Perhaps that is why they remain in perpetual conflict - they have not the time to gain the wisdom to stop before they perish.
A curious thing about the Yankees' starting pitching - they all end with the same letter. I thought this strange and theorized that they did, perhaps, hail from the same area. I was thus astonished to discover that not only did they not hail from the same place, but, indeed, hailed from places very far apart on the planet Earth.
- CC Sabathia hails from California, a place within the region of America
- Hiroki Kuroda hails from Japan
- Masahiro Tanaka hails from Japan
- Ivan Nova hails from Dominican
- Michael Pineda hails from Dominican
The probable finishing pitchers are David Robertson, Shawn Kelly, Matt Thornton, David Phelps, Dellin Betances, Cesar Cabral, Adam Warren. It should be noted that David Robertson is considered the top finisher and is new. The body of their elder finisher called "Mariano Rivera" grew too aged to continue playing. He was beloved by the citizens of the city of New York and by fans of the great game of base-ball in general. This season's bullpen is probably the weakest part of the Yankees team and might be a problem during the season. Last season it wasn't good aside from Mariano Rivera and the team did not make the post-season.
It should be noted that this team has many fans on planet Earth, the most fans of any of the Major League Base-ball teams. Even Earthlings who do not hail from the city of New York or from the region of America like this team. However, many Earthlings also despise the Yankees. This could be for many reasons, perhaps the predominant one being the inequality exhibited by the wealthy Yankees. From what I can tell, the Yankees use other teams to develop young players and then buy them when they reach their primes.
I will be interested to see if the New York Yankees have, in effect, bought their way into the post-season. Using their vast wealth does not guarantee success; however, it does not hurt their chances.
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