Bye, bye, Farney

It's been fun, except when you were running into walls and getting concussions and ripping your body to shreds. You really did make some heckuva plays. And who can forget Ryan Freel Dirty Shirt Night at GAB(p)?

Anytime you lose one of your longtime players, you have to reflect a bit. Below are some posts I wrote about Farney. I seldom wrote about Freel.

Farney's Immigration to America

Interview with a Leprechaun

I am ok with this deal, as we need a catcher (as long as Hanigan gets first shot) and Freel is a walking time bomb. Still, there's always a glimmer of a tear dripping from my heart when a Cincinnati Red leaves for other pastures.

May we finally put the era of losing behind us.

UPDATE: We also lost Justin Turner and Brandon Waring in the deal. I sure hope Walt knows what he's doing. I guess winning two World Series should give him the benefit of the doubt...
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Interview with a Leprechaun

I was lucky enough to conduct a phone interview with Farney over the weekend. He generously provided me with information previously unavailable anywhere in the Reds blogosphere.

COB: So, Farney, what has been the best part of the season for you so far?

Farney: Well, I should say the playoff race, but it's been so frustrating at times that it kind of takes the fun out of it. So, I guess I'll say winning the beer mat contest last month at a pub in San Fran.

COB: Sounds like an accomplishment. How many beer mats did you flip?

Farney: 120.

COB: What?!?

Farney: 120.

COB: You're lying. No one can flip 120 beer mats, especially a little person like you.

Farney: What? Are you discriminating against me? Mocking my vertically challengedness? How dare you!

COB: No, no, I'm not mocking you. The Guinness record for beermat flipping is only 111. If you flipped 120, then you broke the record.

Farney: See why it's the best part of the season?

COB: No. What about Adam Dunn's 40 home runs?

Farney: That's not exciting. He does that every year.

COB: Well, what about his grand slam to win that game?

Farney: Fun, but it proved not to be the turning point in the season.

COB: Rich Aurilia's year?

Farney: Yeah, Richie's having a great year. I'm proud of him. But he doesn't hold the Guinness record for beer mat flipping.

COB: David Ross?

Farney: What about him?

COB: What do you think about his year?

Farney: Lucky him. He and Scott Hatteberg. I sprinkled a little leprechaun dust on them at the beginning of the year and it worked.

COB: Leprechaun dust?

Farney: If I tell you, I'll have to kill you.

COB: What do you think about Bronson's year?

Farney: More dust.

COB: Phillips?

Farney: Dust.

COB: Encarnacion?

Farney: Dust.

COB: So you're saying that the Reds who are having good years owe it to your magic dust?

Farney: Yep.

COB: Why don't you sprinkle some of that dust on Ryan Franklin and Royce Clayton to get them going? Why not the whole team?

Farney: I don't like Franklin or Clayton. Franklin called me a midget, and Clayton sat on me in the clubhouse and didn't even say sorry.

COB: But the others? Wouldn't your dust help the team to the playoffs?

Farney: Uh, that's all the time I have. Nice talking to you.

COB: Wait...